Pizzey differentiates between genuine battered women and violence prone women or “emotional terrorists”. Unconsciously, these women seek or create hostile or violent relationships.
A battered person is the unwilling and innocent victim of his or her partner’s violence; a violence prone person is the unwilling victim of his or her own violence […] A clear distinction to be made between a woman who has accidentally become involved with a violent partner and who now wishes to leave and never return again, and a woman who, for deep psychological reasons or for own, seeks out a violent relationship or a series of violent relationships, with no intentions of leaving.
[…] Opposition against my work with violence prone women and against the theories growing from this work has arisen among certain circles women working in the field of family violence who self identify as “feminists”. […] It is this circle women, clinging fast to a specific set of political and rhetorical beliefs, who have attempted to suppress my theories. (The emotional terrorist and the violence-prone by Erin Pizzey)
Emotional Terrorist and the Violence-Prone by Erin Pizzey $9.99 B003Y5H7YK (Kindle edition)
(download Kindle for PC from amazon.com and get the free preview chapter of this book. Very informative)
|Erin Pizzey opened the very first women’s shelters, where women victims of domestic violence could flee to. To her own surprise she found, that a large percentage of these women were not genuine battered women that needed help to get out of violent relationships.
In domestic violence, men are always at fault. Erin Pizzey breaks a taboo: from her own vast experience running women’s shelters, she discovered a type of women that either seeks, provokes, or creates the violent environment.
Important: See all 5 videos
Many readers will discover that they encountered women of this type before, be it in news about domestic violence, be it their own girl friend or wife, or their own mother.
Pizzey’s findings counter the feminist dogma, that the women is always the victim, and the man is the perpetrator. Feminists countered Pizzey with extreme hostility. Feminists managed to get her book removed from most libraries. Her books are very hard to find.
Conventional wisdom about domestic violence and divorce is based on feminist dogma, on false premises. Hence, the real problems will never be solved and false solutions harm innocent children and men.
The “guilty” emotional terrorist is a victim of her own unconscious rage and a victim of inept society: society, police, therapists and the lawt help the emotional terrorist to get her revenge but fail to help her to cure her real deep seated emotional behavior. She creates her own misery, all life long. She destroys her family, harms her husband, and might set up her children to become as disfunctional as she is.
Further Human Stupidity Analysis
|It is also worth analyzing, if the concept of equality in relationships has not failed. Constant bickering and arguing is not productive. Conflicts need to be solved and cannot be dragged on forever. It seems, that if one person yields, and the other person has the final say, that is the only way how a family relationship can work.
In every enterprise, in court, everywhere, the boss (or a majority vote), make definite decisions which must be respected by the over-ruled minority. In the EEA (environment of evolutionary adaptedness) , the classic stone-age family structure, this would, most likey be the man, or the larger family or tribal unit.
There is significant research in psychology, that in happy life long couples, there always is one dominant partner who has the final say. (yes, this could be the woman)
|PS:I differ from Pizzey here: It is quite plausible that this emotional terrorist behavior has a genetic component. There certainly are women, who, in spite of adverse childhood, do not become “violence prone”. And some violence prone women might have helped to actually create their own traumatic childhood, by their own unruly temperament.
The emotional terrorist
|[…] Such individuals, spurred on by deep feelings of vengeful mess, vindictiveness, and animosity, behave in a manner that is singularly destructive; destructive to themselves as well as to some or all of the other family members, making an already bad family situation worse. These women I have found it useful described as ‘family terrorists.’
[…] There seems to be a blanket of silence over the large amount of violence expressed by women. Because ‘family terrorism’ is a tactic largely used by women and my work in the domestic violence unit is largely with women, I address this problem discussing only my work with women.
The potential for family terrorism may rest dormant for many years, emerging in its full might only under certain circumstances. I found that in many cases it is the dissolution, or threatened dissolution, of the family that calls to the fore the terrorist’s destructiveness. It is essential to understand that prior to dissolution, the potential terrorist plays a role in the family that is by no means passive. The terrorist is the family member whose moods reigned supreme in the family, whose whims and actions determine the emotional climate of the household. In this setting, the terrorists could be described as the family tyrant, for whether the family, this individual maintains the control and power over the other members’ emotions.
[…] It is the terrorist on tyrant who is primarily responsible for initiating conflict, imposing histrionic outbursts upon otherwise calm situations, or (more subtly invisibly) quietly manipulating other family members into uproar through guilt, cunning taunts, and barely perceptive provocations. (The quiet, manipulative terrorist usually is the most undetected terrorist. Through the subtle creation of perpetual turmoil, this terrorist may virtually drive other family members into alcoholism, to drug-addiction, to explosive behavior, to suicide. The other family members, therefore, are often misperceived as the ‘family problem’ and the hidden terrorist as a saintly woman who puts up with this all.)
While the family remains together, however miserable that ‘togetherness’ might be, the terrorist maintains her power. However, it is often the separation of the family that promises to rend the terrorist’s domain and consequently to lessen her power. Family dissolution, therefore, often is the time when the terrorist feels most threatened and most alone, and, because of that, most dangerous.
Emotional Terrorist and the Violence-Prone by Erin Pizzey $9.99 B003Y5H7YK (Kindle edition)
(download Kindle for PC from amazon.com and get the free preview chapter of this book. Very informative) The emotional terrorist and the violence-prone by Erin Pizzey $19.95 0889701032
In this important book, suppressed in England, Pizzey argues that not every battered woman is simply a victim. To successfully reduce violence, Pizzy convincingly shows that domestic violence prevention workers must distinguish between the emotional terrorist, addicted to pain and provoking violence, and those truly seeking escape from violence. This is the successor to “Scream Quietly or the Neighbours Will Hear”;, the first book on wife battering. It is a challenging must-read for all those dealing with family violence, policy-makers, family rights activists and anyone concerned about violence in society. The book contains the updated text of the original book, suppressed in England, minus outdated appendices, plus Pizzey s new research and conclusions comparing battered women and violence-prone women. A separate section describes the “emotional terrorist”;, a personality instantly recognizable to their targets.
Pizzey now describes the example of Adolf Hitler: when it became clear that the war could not be one, he ordered his troops to destroy Berlin.
I define a violence prone woman as a woman who, while complaining that she is the innocent victim of the malice and aggression of all other relationships in her life is in fact a victim of her own violence and aggression. […]
The terrorist is aware only of her own pain in outreach and and, feeling or empathy for other family members, would proceed single – mindedly in pursuit of her role, whether that goal is reunion, ruin, or revenge. The terrorist’s perspective is tempered by little or no objectivity. Instead the terrorist lives in the self-contained world of purely subjective pain and anger.
[…] It is difficult to leave such a woman, and the man attempted to leave may well feel that, by leaving, he would be responsible for delivering a mortal blow to an already pathetic wretch. Men also are often kept in their relationships, which can only be likely to ‘personal concentration – camps,’ by the fact that they feel a genuine feeling of ‘chivalry’ towards their partner. (The emotional terrorist and the violence-prone by Erin Pizzey)
Pizzey proposes specific therapies geared towards violence prone individuals. Pizzey believes that all this “terrorist” behavior is due to childhood trauma, due to children living in such unhealthy relationships.
In other words, men with such wives, in such relationships need to worry about the future of their children, about creating guture emotional terrorists who are set up to fail in their relationships.